Blog 42 – All the way (Home) natural

Blog 42 – All the way (Home) natural

In the interests of keeping things simple I decided to ruin the sequence and flow of the trip to Australia and do the journey home.  With that plan set I decided to do a couple of add ins later to use up the last of my memory power and fit in with some plan Phillip’s got.

So here it comes folks, the last days of being down under.  Where to start, well I suppose it goes back a couple of days maybe Thursday, and the start of every trip home after being away for a month. Clean all me dirty washing especially knic… underpants, get it dry (not difficult – its 26’ outside ), fold it nicely and put it in the .  case. Having used one case for secondary purposes on the way out, the said case is now half empty/full ( see neither optimistic or the other) OMG I’ll be able to get everything in, fingers and toes crossing – Man Packing suitcase remember. The big worry – the weight – was never a problem, stop me if I spoke about this previously (bet you can’t).  On the outward journey the two ladies who accompanied me (not airport security – as if) but D2 & GD2 had their cases stuffed to the gunnels (the things for emptying water off the decks on ships -  no I don’t know why either ) coming in just under the heavyweight flag at 29.6 and 29.8kgs a piece. Yours’s truly weighed in at middle to featherweight by comparison at a mere 20.4kgs – who said men can’t pack cases. Mind you it took three days to pack one of the two I finally handed over with a heavy duty back pack making a grand total of 34.0kgs, all legal and no extra charges hip hip hooray!!.

Anyway, I digress – see it’s happened again, I started these bloggy things last august, at that time using nice little words. But now this lap-dog – Wrong- top computer gizmo uses more words than I know. Note to self – find out why). Back to Aus, yeah that’s right packing case one.  Well apart from the stuff that has to go in, there’s the extra bags of rubbish – wrong again – souvenirs, all taking up the space I had gained. So what nex? What can I leave behind that won’t be missed or wanted? What do you mean everything!!  Shocked outrage!!  Solution in a word  --  squash it!  I know that’s two words, whose writing this anyway! More outrage!  It’s amazing just how much stuff you can squeeze in if you’re going to blame breakages on the various baggage  handlers on route.

The second case was no problem, I fact ever took a rattling suitcase off hols? Join the club! There was nothing really just all my remaining unwashed clothes, all my shoes – where did that pair come from?, coats – why did I bring not one but three jackets when it’s mid-summer -  temperature 26’C minimum? – consul your self, you did hear one correctly,  read this next bit carefully and swoon with jealousy. Well you did wear it to attend (see what I mean about words)the presentation by the Australian Opera Company of “The Barber of Seville” at (Wait for it – Wait for it) THE SYDNEY OPERA HOUSE -spectacular or what!!!!!  Back to work, that doesn’t justify stupidity – three indeed – muppet. 14 shirts and teeshirts – but I only came with 4 shirts and 4 teeshirts – hmm! Must have bought a couple, can’t remember – getting old – had them given by charity shop!?. All going well until the last knockins when the remaining gifts and washing kit await entry into the land of suetcassie.   The nearly, darned close, almost last bag to pack is the back pack, all my electronic kit goes in there together with me emergency saving face kit, documents and sweets, and guess what, plonker here forgot that he purchased an other backpack made by his travel goods supplier (I won’t drop names but it begins with S and ends in ITE  -  NO IT MOST DEFINITELY NOT THE OTHER STUFF).  TW empties case two and starts again. It’s no good part packing because all the contents drops to the bottom meaning you have empty it anyway and repack. Here I go again – Dolly Parton once disliked but now admired country singer – working the night shift finally managing to apply locking procedure at captain’s log – star date – 250237. 

I survey the room, a little tale about the London room that.  When I arrived I was given the choice between the spare room 1 -   the London Room (because of the décor) or the plain ordinary spare room.  I choose the London Room (higher bed) and moved in.because I threatened to return, it was naturally assumed I’d use the same room (not by me) by the Kids and Offspring, to the extent that they are now calling it  “Grandad’s Room”

Everything that needs to be packed is packed and standing around waiting to be transported home to mother England. And so to bed.

We’re all up reasonably early for a Damien Special, for regular readers you would have guessed what we’re having already. But TW may be in error – it’s only been a week and his faculties are degrading already.  Didn’t the grownups are breakfast in town – NO panic over -  it was the evening before when TW was asked if he would like to go to one of his regular haunts for a final Fresh Cream Apple Turnover and coffee. Reluctantly TW concurs – Leonardo De Caprio in “Catch me if you can” .  The group attends this temple of decadence, this emporium of delectable patisseries otherwise known as Pattissons. But just before the group remove their shoes and bath in holy water, an emergency diversion is called for to enter the retail heaven that is Kmart, you know the one everything on the planet, and where TW wants to get socks for Lana the world’s sock connoisseur and stumbles across a parting gift for SIL1,  an electric glitter ball mushroom, which TW believes will enhance the splendid barbeque SIL1 built using grandson as slave labour, and help hide some of the shame generated by owning slaves. Happy to say grandson is not affected and his role in “SpongeBob and SquarePants – the musical” has been unaffected by the trauma.

Back to breakfast, Tina and Jess go for the usual squished avo and scrambled eggs while the men have bacon, scrambled eggs and sourdough toast, delicious!  Once fed and kitchen sink tidy – the only possible indicator that the washing up is done, the family have the last day together. With the flight at 9.00pm, to the airport 5.45pm, a trip out somewhere nice is called for.  The group had a yearning particularly for fish and chips and are heading out to Manly in search of lunch, particularly MESSINAS ICE CREAM, the queen (or King) of frozen cream.

Manly is miles out of town past the venue Gunners Barracks, where we had high tea, D2 wanted to stop at her favourite shoe shop. It appears that SIL1 didn’t hear her (according to rumour he is a bit mutt and jeff) and glides on to the Manly Beach. We’re there  before you know it, went straight to the sea front and to the fish and chip, squid, octopus, and all sorts of weird fish (not the cloths but really weird fish!!) shop and down to the sea front with the sun shining and wind blowing hats and all sorts of other detritus, found a vacant seat facing the ocean, and we all (including the sea gulls, fact alert fact alert, there are no such things as sea gulls just GULLS – never make that mistake people or I will be after you) had  an enjoyable lunch.  The gulls  had to go elsewhere for dessert, we were off to Messinas, saying good bye to the incoming blue jelly fish who had decided to make it a beach and jelly afternoon.

We had our Messinas – fabulous as expected -only one scope today, I’m dieting – not, we had a walk through the artisan market with all sorts of hand made goods. We continue along the main roadway to the opposite side of Manly and the bus station to collect gd2 but 1 in Aus, who travelled for one and half hours on a bus to spend time before travelling to the airport, with TW – bless her. We went in silence to the car and made our way to the airport – don’t ask the proper name I never can remember, park up check in and off load the suitcases. Guess what the weight of the big case was, what with the extras such as plates and headphones I’d garnered on my travels?     

20.4 kgs  Exactly the same as when I left BHX.  Cool or what, wake up doh- doh it’s only luggage. It’s nothing to do with principle but to showing the two 29+kgs baggage mis-handlers how it’s done.

We wonder very quietly down the concourse – but only after D2 has a few words with airport staff, for a drink before I go. It’s the quietest half hour all holiday.  Eventually the goodbyes are said , the come back soon is said (and I felt meant – I couldn’t have misbehaved too much then), and the return to AP post and the carriage to the A380 – 800 (which will always be Ben’s Plane to me.) Show the BC and seat 65G is mark as my place of rest for the next 15 hours + – the coincidence, or not, is that I have exactly the same seat after the transfer for the final leg. 

Can you imagine how mind numbing that is?   Aircraft 1, Seat 65G (14.5 hours) – Terminal 32 to Terminal 31 wheelchair 25 minutes – Aircraft 2 seat 65G (7.5 hours) which when you  add it up comes to over 24hours siting in the same spot with nothing to do but watch c..p movies.  Go by boat next time!! 

As always I doze between film credits, wake up for the meals, wake up to give them back, eat sweets, keep stocked up with G & Ts and between times, bearing in mind most of the passengers are at repose, sit quietly thinking about getting in the morning,  with crush around the carousel (no.4) being picked and shuffled home, feeling knackered thinking about  what a great time had and all the places we visited, the lone kangaroo at Georgina’s and the lonely tomahawk steaks at Tina’s – all these fun events and things done are very soon to be relegated to memory with the words echoing in my numbed brain – Normality starts tomorrow ………

That said, to paraphrase the great Australian actor:   I’LL BE BACK    (lol)